That's why the ministry is considered a calling.

It's also why Fagerberg, Pastor Emeritus of Lutheran Church of the Ascension in Northfield, founded Ministry Mentors, a spiritually based, not-for-profit organization staffed with highly qualified clergy who provide mentoring and support services for pastors of all Christian denominations.

"People who minister need encouragement," said Fagerberg. "Ministry is one of the most — if not the most — stressful professions in this country. Parishioners say, 'What can you do for me and my children?' Pastors are under enormous pressure to deliver."

Don Fagerberg speaks from experience. For more than 36 years he served as a minister to congregations of the Evangelical Lutheran Church in America, first as an associate pastor in Bloomington, Ill., and for 30 years as senior pastor at Ascension in Northfield.

His tenure at Ascension, which was longer than most pastors stay at a congregation, was a success on many levels. Thanks to a charismatic personality and excellent administrative skills, he grew the congregation, expanded the building and increased benevolence giving dramatically during a time when many mainline Protestant churches were losing ground.

Still, he says, of himself and every other minister: "Every time you show up you did it right and you didn't do it right."

In other words, you can't please everyone. But you are expected to. And this creates a lot of stress.

It also created an idea. Before his retirement from congregational ministry in 2001, Fagerberg began formulating plans for a different kind of ministry: a ministry to ministers.

"It becomes clear at a certain stage in life that it's time to give back. As I was thinking ahead toward retirement, I felt there was something more to do. I wanted to use my insight and skills in some way, and I saw this as a new role for me, a way to go from the spotlight to behind the scenes.

"Ministry is about helping people, formally or informally, and Ministry Mentors grew out of a desire to help those who help others," said Fagerberg, 65, who serves as its president. The organization is modeled after the Stephen Ministry Program, a one-to-one lay ministry that has found success in many Christian congregations, including Ascension. Stephen Ministers, however, are trained primarily to listen, while "Pastors are trained as counselors but called upon to have many skill sets," said Fagerberg. "I chose the term mentor as broadest of all," he added, explaining that counseling and coaching are also at the heart of the pastor-to-pastor service.

"The mentor visits the church of the pastor he is mentoring to understand some of the dynamics," he said, and the mentoring can focus on any and every aspect of a minister's life. "It can be about things both pastoral and personal, everything from sermon coaching to marital counseling to where you are going with your ministry.

"It's a safe place to vent," Fagerberg said. "Mentors don't always have all the answers — they can and do refer to other professionals — but they are someone in your corner with no ax to grind."

He explained that there exists between members of the clergy a level of honesty that could not be achieved with an outside mentor. It's an "I hear you, I've been there," kind of thing.

The problem is, where clergy are today is not where they used to be.

"Society has changed. Once clergy were the most educated and respected members of the community. Our culture was supportive of the clergy and of religion. Now Sunday is just another day," said Fagerberg.

Reduced giving has followed the change in priorities. "Our parents gave first to the church, but today there are more demands on our time and money and the church gets what's left."

Along with lower levels of giving, he said, there is a consumer mentality about church and religion. "Expectations are so high, there is so much entitlement," Fagerberg said. "Young pastors are expected to save a failing congregation. Pastors are judged by circumstances beyond their control."

Inevitably, there is a ripple effect on their families. "A growing number of pastors say ministry has a negative impact on their marriage. When a spouse is being criticized, it's hard on the one who has to hear," he said. Often kids feel the stress, too.

Then there are the financial issues. Decreased giving and the current economy mean spouses usually have to work. "And ministers live in a fishbowl. They don't have weekends, and holidays are always off stride," said Fagerberg.

"Almost no preachers' kids become preachers," pointed out the father of three, none of whose children has entered the ministry.

"Fewer young people are entering the seminary," he said. "We have a crisis of leadership in the church. Those with great leadership skills are going into other professions. Many of our ministers are coming in as second career people with fewer years of ministry ahead of them. We are going into a clergy shortage."

Fagerberg hopes to counter that trend by "serving those who serve" (the Ministry Mentors motto).

To do so, he has gathered a 15-member advisory board of prominent people in the fields of business, law, medicine and theology, and presently has five associates in five different denominations who are mentoring other pastors. Mentors are Dr. Martha Greene, Senior Pastor, Winnetka Presbyterian Church; Rev. Duayne Meyer, Senior Pastor, Northfield Community Church; Rev. Linda Foster Momsen, former Senior Pastor, First United Methodist Church, Park Ridge; Rev. Jerry Tews, Senior Pastor, Holy Trinity Lutheran Church, Glenview; and Dr. Graham Smith, Rector, St. David's Episcopal Church, Glenview.

The cost of mentoring is underwritten primarily by contributions from individuals, foundations and congregations. Ministry Mentors was recently awarded a grant from Wheat Ridge Ministries, a charitable organization that provides support for new church-related health and hope ministries. "I was pleased by the endorsement as well as the dollars — to be found as a vision worthy of support," said Fagerberg, who hopes to grow the organization nationwide.

So he is recruiting — actively and enthusiastically. "We are looking for the best pastors we can find to help other pastors be a blessing to the church and the community."

For more information, either about mentoring or being mentored,
call (847) 729-1644; e-mail Don@ministrymentors.org;
or visit www.ministrymentors.org .